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Literature Text
Weasel Skeet
Scrapped Chapter: II: In Which There is Romance Between Waterfowl and Poultry
After a couple of days after the initial couple of days, Vane Lobby was little closer to finding any information on the whereabouts of the boar woman’s stolen jewelry. Not anyone came to him with any information or to him with no information. No one, in two days, came to him with anything. He spoke to no one as it seemed everyone avoided him.
Vane wandered the hotel, looking for Rudolph, who had, after needing to leave early from their discussion on the everything Vane was so desperate to learn, promised he’d make every effort with whatever time he had free to continue talking with Mr Lobby about everything. Allusive as ever, on the phone, and without footsteps as Rudolph chose mainly to hover whilst telephoning, Vane finally found the hotel’s owner passing through the lobby with some servant named Ryan who was holding a phone for his employer. Vane approached the check-in as less was going on there and it was motionless, though this day everyone was on the telephone.
“…Mr Lobby, I mean, Vane is here now. Please let me call back later…Yes, he wants everyone to be called by their forename…I know it’s silly, but I could get sacked if I don’t do it…Yes, Mr Lobby, Vane is here…Oh, I’ll ask him…
“Vane?”
“Yes, Eybus.”
“It’s Veydus. Would you like to speak with him?”
“Um, actually I wanted to speak with you.”
“Oh. All right…Yes, Veydus…I really must go. Vane wishes to speak with me…Yes, goodbye, Veydus…Yes…Please you call. I’m not really allowed to make outgoing calls right now…I know, I know…I love you too.
“…So, Vane, what would you like? I’m really here to help you in any way I can.”
“I’m seeking knowledge.”
“Oh, well, Veydus and I are only friends right now. You see, he called to make the arrangements for your coming here a few months back and, well, I’ve just been keeping in contact with him. It’s only a friendship. I know how he’s in prison and all, but he’s such a gentleman. I’ve not spoken to a chicken-headed man so dapper before. Usually they’re—”
“Eybus?”
“Yes, Vane?”
“I’m looking more for information on the burgling incident.”
“Oh, I want to help you as much as I can, sir, but I really know nothing about it. When it happened I was down here behind the desk. Grebe can confirm that.”
“I don’t think you’ve done the burglary, but do you have any idea who might?”
“Actually, sir, I do.”
“You do?”
“I do. Vane, I really don’t to put any blame on anybody. That’s why I never came to you. In fact, Vane, that’ why I’ve been avoiding you for the past two days. I’m sorry. I really don’t want anyone in trouble. I knew you’d ask the moment you ran into me. Vane, there’s a strange family that came in here shortly before you arrived. Grebe checked them in. They didn’t seem the sort that comes to a place like this for the fancy dining or business venture. Vane, I think they’re crooks.”
“You mean the family with the children?”
“That’s the one, sir.”
“Do any of them have an alibi?”
“They all do, sir.”
“They do?”
“Yes, Vane. They were all down here asking if there was a pool in the hotel. You see, I told them there is no pool here, but they insisted a place this fancy ought to have a pool. I told them I didn’t build this place and so there’s no pool here. As waterfowl, I would have installed a pool. But I did tell them they could go swim with those fish women. I said it politely of course.”
“If they were with you when the crime occurred, how could they have stolen the jewelry?”
“That Rupert or Robert or whatever they call him chap can steal things and still have an alibi for the crime. Oh, I don’t mean to say that Rupert did it this time.”
“This time?”
“No, no, Vane. I never said that. Rupert’s never done anything bad. He’s good. Not bad.”
Scrapped Chapter: II: In Which There is Romance Between Waterfowl and Poultry
After a couple of days after the initial couple of days, Vane Lobby was little closer to finding any information on the whereabouts of the boar woman’s stolen jewelry. Not anyone came to him with any information or to him with no information. No one, in two days, came to him with anything. He spoke to no one as it seemed everyone avoided him.
Vane wandered the hotel, looking for Rudolph, who had, after needing to leave early from their discussion on the everything Vane was so desperate to learn, promised he’d make every effort with whatever time he had free to continue talking with Mr Lobby about everything. Allusive as ever, on the phone, and without footsteps as Rudolph chose mainly to hover whilst telephoning, Vane finally found the hotel’s owner passing through the lobby with some servant named Ryan who was holding a phone for his employer. Vane approached the check-in as less was going on there and it was motionless, though this day everyone was on the telephone.
“…Mr Lobby, I mean, Vane is here now. Please let me call back later…Yes, he wants everyone to be called by their forename…I know it’s silly, but I could get sacked if I don’t do it…Yes, Mr Lobby, Vane is here…Oh, I’ll ask him…
“Vane?”
“Yes, Eybus.”
“It’s Veydus. Would you like to speak with him?”
“Um, actually I wanted to speak with you.”
“Oh. All right…Yes, Veydus…I really must go. Vane wishes to speak with me…Yes, goodbye, Veydus…Yes…Please you call. I’m not really allowed to make outgoing calls right now…I know, I know…I love you too.
“…So, Vane, what would you like? I’m really here to help you in any way I can.”
“I’m seeking knowledge.”
“Oh, well, Veydus and I are only friends right now. You see, he called to make the arrangements for your coming here a few months back and, well, I’ve just been keeping in contact with him. It’s only a friendship. I know how he’s in prison and all, but he’s such a gentleman. I’ve not spoken to a chicken-headed man so dapper before. Usually they’re—”
“Eybus?”
“Yes, Vane?”
“I’m looking more for information on the burgling incident.”
“Oh, I want to help you as much as I can, sir, but I really know nothing about it. When it happened I was down here behind the desk. Grebe can confirm that.”
“I don’t think you’ve done the burglary, but do you have any idea who might?”
“Actually, sir, I do.”
“You do?”
“I do. Vane, I really don’t to put any blame on anybody. That’s why I never came to you. In fact, Vane, that’ why I’ve been avoiding you for the past two days. I’m sorry. I really don’t want anyone in trouble. I knew you’d ask the moment you ran into me. Vane, there’s a strange family that came in here shortly before you arrived. Grebe checked them in. They didn’t seem the sort that comes to a place like this for the fancy dining or business venture. Vane, I think they’re crooks.”
“You mean the family with the children?”
“That’s the one, sir.”
“Do any of them have an alibi?”
“They all do, sir.”
“They do?”
“Yes, Vane. They were all down here asking if there was a pool in the hotel. You see, I told them there is no pool here, but they insisted a place this fancy ought to have a pool. I told them I didn’t build this place and so there’s no pool here. As waterfowl, I would have installed a pool. But I did tell them they could go swim with those fish women. I said it politely of course.”
“If they were with you when the crime occurred, how could they have stolen the jewelry?”
“That Rupert or Robert or whatever they call him chap can steal things and still have an alibi for the crime. Oh, I don’t mean to say that Rupert did it this time.”
“This time?”
“No, no, Vane. I never said that. Rupert’s never done anything bad. He’s good. Not bad.”
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And the biology comes to a close for now.
Yeah, I didn't like where this one was going. It's rubbish. Why wouldn't Vane speak with Veydus? BS! Eybus wouldn't just rat someone out! BS! What kind of sense does it make? BS! This was the reason I created Ruggs because she's kind of like a gossip, but she bases her facts on real observations she's made. She doesn't play the blame game. In fact, she's so vague and confusing I'd kill her off had I not promised myself no one was going to die in the Hotel Arc.
Read the real story (Real as in totally based on real life, like people with chicken heads and magical artifacts and robots and such) here: motherofsephy.deviantart.com/g…
I finished that crap Romance Novel. It was horrid, but not the worst thing I've ever read. It was only eye-rollingly hilarious because of the rakish description of our rakish hero. Vomit! It was by far, not poorly written at all, thank goodness. WHATEVER! Now I'm trying to get through When Marnie was There because of the Ghibli film. I have a fourth edition of the novel (it was reprinted?) and it's not all that good. I could hardly get through the first chapter because of a horrible typographical error.
Ahem! And I quote: 'She and Sam would be glad to have her, though not so young as they was and Sam's rheumatics something chronic last winter.' Reading through it four times, I've come to realise that it's a response to a letter, answering each point after a comma, but what a load of bollocks! I also discovered a spelling error at about chapter 3 where the word 'were' is misspelled 'wer'. The hell?! I'm only 26 pages in and it's unreadable. The film looks amazing! Please export it over here. I'd love to pay way too much for the cinema.
Yeah, I didn't like where this one was going. It's rubbish. Why wouldn't Vane speak with Veydus? BS! Eybus wouldn't just rat someone out! BS! What kind of sense does it make? BS! This was the reason I created Ruggs because she's kind of like a gossip, but she bases her facts on real observations she's made. She doesn't play the blame game. In fact, she's so vague and confusing I'd kill her off had I not promised myself no one was going to die in the Hotel Arc.
Read the real story (Real as in totally based on real life, like people with chicken heads and magical artifacts and robots and such) here: motherofsephy.deviantart.com/g…
I finished that crap Romance Novel. It was horrid, but not the worst thing I've ever read. It was only eye-rollingly hilarious because of the rakish description of our rakish hero. Vomit! It was by far, not poorly written at all, thank goodness. WHATEVER! Now I'm trying to get through When Marnie was There because of the Ghibli film. I have a fourth edition of the novel (it was reprinted?) and it's not all that good. I could hardly get through the first chapter because of a horrible typographical error.
Ahem! And I quote: 'She and Sam would be glad to have her, though not so young as they was and Sam's rheumatics something chronic last winter.' Reading through it four times, I've come to realise that it's a response to a letter, answering each point after a comma, but what a load of bollocks! I also discovered a spelling error at about chapter 3 where the word 'were' is misspelled 'wer'. The hell?! I'm only 26 pages in and it's unreadable. The film looks amazing! Please export it over here. I'd love to pay way too much for the cinema.
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